there's this woman i really look up to..

and her name is Alina Garbuz (her Blog is here.)

last night was the first time seeing her in eight months.
when you go read her blog like i highly recommend, you'll wanna cry.
anyways, just go read her blog.


I just got home about an hour or two ago from New Mexico.
T or C...hmm :) its a wonderful little town.
its very small, the first wal-mart opened like two years ago.

anyways, i went to youth last night. and i messed up. I've been wanting new new new for SO long, but when Jake gave the altar call( MY ONE CHANCE!!), i went up to the sound booth.

ugh. i am such a procrastinator. but then i get mad at God for just sitting there.

but it's me. I'm the one sitting there. silly me...

and i made another mistake last night as well. (seems like those things keep popping up everywhere...)
my best friend was trying to help me. and i hurt him. badly. he'll probably wear the scar for a long time. he didn't deserve it, believe me! I'm not normally like that...but i hurt him. and now he wont talk to me. don't blame him. but I'm scared I've lost him for good.

i hope he believes in grace...

<3