until You and i are one.

so i haven't written an actual post in a while.
i decided to, while i'm still in the mood.
so it's Spring Break, finally.
and my little sister and i have been in T or C since Friday.

i've been longing for this place, these people, this air.
i've been missing all the smiles and hugs.
and the sincerity.
and the honesty.
i've been missing HOME.

have you ever had a place to call home?
have you ever had a family you weren't related to?
this is my home.
these people inspire me to be so much better than i am.
they have shown me what i'm capable of.
and they know that i'm not living up to my potential.

i kind of think i'm being stupid.
like, i have all these dreams and desires.
i wanna be on fire for Who i believe in.
i want Him to be all i ever see, and even think about.
i wanna be a missionary.
but i keep letting people and circumstances hide me.

i'm sick of watching documentaries of greatness.
i wanna reinvent the meaning of the word great!
i'm puking up this disease of conformity.

i feel like i'm just sitting here.
i write all this crap down, but i never do anything about it!

ugh..

"i don't wanna talk about You like You're not in the room. i wanna look right at You! i wanna sing right to You!!"

<3